这类直译问题造成语句生硬、用词啰嗦,或者不符合英文表达习惯。
例句1:在中国,一些教育机构打着颠覆传统教育的标语从事线上教育。 不好:In China, some education enterprises conducted online education with a slogan of overturning traditional education. 较好:In China, some education enterprises described their work as overturning traditional education and conducted online education. 例句2:相比于设备甲,我更相信设备乙。 不好:I believe device A more than device B. 较好:I believe device A would be more effective than device B. 例句3:随着时光流逝,这些企业从市场上消失了。 不好:These enterprises faded away from the market as time went by. 较好:Over time, these enterprises faded away from the market. 例句4:从中国教育部的统计资料可以看出,截止到2016年,中小学网络覆盖率达到87%。 不好:We have seen statistics from the Ministry of Education of China showing that the Internet access rate of elementary and high schools in China had reached 87% by 2016. 较好:Statistics from the Ministry of Education of China have shown that, by 2016, the Internet access rate of elementary and high schools in China had reached 87%. 例句5:看到这些成就,我逐渐坚定了职业方向,希望能为机械工程领域做出贡献。 不好:I have observed these achievements, and I have gradually decided my directions of career development in order to make good contributions to the field of mechanical engineering. 较好:I have observed these achievements, which inspired me to direct my career development to contribute positively to the field of mechanical engineering. 例句6:由于他们片面理解“技术”概念,导致失败。 不好:They failed due to their partial understanding of the “technology” concept. 较好:They failed due to their partial understanding of the role of technology. 例句7:这些技术不论软硬都是有用的。 错误:These technologies, regardless soft or hard, are useful. 正确:These technologies, whether soft or hard, are useful.错误2:语言啰嗦。 这类问题造成用词偏多,篇幅过长。纠正这类问题时,不仅需要把“in order to”简化为“to”,而且需要从用词结构上予以简化。学术写作应当力求简洁精炼。 不好:This experience was the motivation for me to pursue study in mechanical engineering. 较好:This experience motivated me to pursue study in mechanical engineering 不好:This is an important stage during the growth of children. 较好:This is an important stage in children’s growth. 不好:There are powerful voices to call for changes in systems engineering. 较好:Powerful voices are calling for changes in systems engineering. 错误3:主语和宾语的语序颠倒 这类问题的原因是写法不符合英文表达习惯。 不好:Changing people’s perception of the nature of systems engineering is the key to the success of making positive changes in system science. 较好:The key to making positive changes in system science is transforming the perception of the nature of systems engineering. 错误4:对于以“Only”开头的强调式状语,未将动词反置在主语前面 这类问题涉及以“Only after”、“Only if”、“Only in this way”等开头的句子。 错误:Only by changing the work condition, it is possible for them to finish the project. 正确:Only by changing the work condition, is it possible for them to finish the project.
错误5:没有适时强调否定式 不强调否定:The performance or the durability of the engine has not been changed. 强调否定:Neither the performance nor the durability of the engine has been changed.
错误6:表达原因的写法不符合英文习惯 不好:I thought the reason was that I was not fluent in German. 较好:I thought this was because I was not fluent in German. 不好:The reason for the engineers to choose this software was that they wanted fast computation. 较好:The engineers have chosen this software because they wanted fast computation.
错误7:没有前置状语短语 经常提倡的所谓状语后置原则是为了突出主语。但是,在安排状语短语的位置时,不应当牺牲修饰关系清晰性、语意连续性、特意强调性。 修饰关系清晰性不好:Some education enterprises described their work as overturning traditional education and conducted online education in China. 修饰关系清晰性较好:In China, some education enterprises described their work as overturning traditional education and conducted online education. 语意连续性不好:I received support from my parents when I was young in learning math. 语意连续性较好:When I was young, my parents supported me in learning math. 特意强调性不好:I studied in Shanghai in mechanical engineering during my four years of undergraduate study. 特意强调性较好:During my four years of undergraduate study, I studied in Shanghai in mechanical engineering.
错误8:未将带有“with”和动名词的状语短语变成动词从句,不符合英文表达习惯 不好:His effort will be rewarded with his careful plan and persistent pursuing. 较好:His effort will be rewarded as he pursues his careful plan with persistence.
错误9:在表达使用措施的“with”、“by”、“using”之间有混淆 不好:The gas temperature was measured with the thermocouple. 较好:The gas temperature was measured using the thermocouple. 不好:The oxygen concentration was measured by using an oxygen sensor. 较好:The oxygen concentration was measured using an oxygen sensor.
错误10:忽略必须使用的从句及其时态 错误:I found that there were numerous tools originated from modern technology. 正确:I found that there were numerous tools that had originated from modern technology. 不好:There are great differences between the children receiving quality-oriented education and the children receiving exam-oriented education. 较好:There are great differences between children who receive quality-oriented education and those who receive exam-oriented education.
错误11:误用被动语态,不符合英文表达习惯 不好:Some technologies are easy to be mastered and implemented by these companies. 较好:Some technologies are easy for these companies to master and implement.
错误12:介词多余 错误:The analysis focus was on passing inspection. 正确:The analysis focus was passing inspection. 错误:The temperature is at 100 °C. 正确:The temperature is 100 °C.
错误13:介词缺失 错误:The reduction in thermal efficiency caused by friction can be compensated by reducing heat transfer losses. 正确:The reduction in thermal efficiency caused by friction can be compensated for by reducing heat transfer losses. 错误:I searched solutions. 正确:I searched for solutions.
错误14:介词搭配错误 错误:They developed the product with joint efforts of external teams. 正确:They developed the product in a joint effort with external teams. 错误:I was admitted to the Ph.D. program of Chemistry in Washington University in 2012. 正确:In 2012, I was admitted to the Ph.D. program in Chemistry at Washington University. 错误:He provided an answer for this question. 正确:He provided answer to this question. 不好:The temperature drop leads to the reduction of thermal efficiency. 较好:The temperature drop leads to the reduction in thermal efficiency.
错误15:不定冠词“a”或“an”与定冠词“the”的混淆或缺失 错误:The maximum efficiency was 80%, obtained with the inlet gas velocity of 12 m/s. 正确:The maximum efficiency was 80%, obtained with an inlet gas velocity of 12 m/s.
错误16:用错单数和复数 错误:At a temperature above 300 ℃, the thermal efficiency decreased slightly. 正确:At temperatures above 300 ℃, the thermal efficiency decreased slightly.
错误17:漏用撇号所有格形式 虽然名词能够修饰名词,但在很多情况下,使用带撇号的所有格形式能将修饰关系表达得更清晰。 不好:The measurement point A was at the dust collector inlet. 较好:The measurement point A was at the dust collector’s inlet.
错误18:书名未使用斜体,或误用引号或中文书名号 错误:I read the books of “Principles of Vibration” and《Fluid Mechanics》. 正确:I read Principles of Vibration and Fluid Mechanics.
错误19:论文或文章的标题未加引号,或误用斜体。 错误:I wrote a thesis titled Engine Performance Analysis at High-Altitude Conditions. 正确:I wrote a thesis titled “Engine Performance Analysis at High-Altitude Conditions”.
错误20:使用口语化的非正式用词